Serving Britain

Found this poem on Facebook and thought it was lovely:

When one becomes connected

To the military family
It does not matter which part one is in
You’ll always be proud of all three

Masters of the seas … The Royal Navy
Might be the oldest of the three
But they’ll still send enemies packing
To keep our waters free

Masters of the skies … The Royal Air Force
Put on breathtaking show
When taking out a target
Before they even know

Masters of the land … The British Army
Our Brothers in Arms of course
Britain’s got no worries
Thanks to this truly awesome force

Operational tours can be very hard to face
With loved ones posted away
Facing so much danger
Putting their lives on the line every day

But our armed forces have another role
Through the hearts and minds they share
Building whole new lives for less privileged folk
Showing them that they care

When posted at home bases
They’re still away from home
But at least there’s much less danger
And they don’t feel so alone

Then there are the ceremonies
Each service playing their part
Regalia, pomp and circumstance
All delivered from the heart

Military shows
Truly spectacular displays
Showing the world what our armed forces do best
Whilst spectators watch on so amazed

There may be three separate forces
Each one serving a role
But they’re one big military family
Serving Britain – their ultimate goal

© Michaela Turner (aka Kale) proud mum of a serving soldier

Jabba The Hut Kills Us All

So, I'm known for my randomness and my weird dreams (without eating cheese before I go to bed) so here is my latest stupid dream pish:

So, I was back with Jonathan (my ex-husband for those not in the know) and I wasn't happy. I wanted to leave and had to find the right moment to tell him. This moment turned out to be when lots of pregnant women were doing yoga in the front room of the house we were renting.

As I was telling Jonathan to 'git tae' a bloke in a convertible Capri told me I had to go with him. I was with my pal Leigh-Ann so decided it was fine to go with him. He told me that Jonathan was a dick and that he was his ex-boyfriend so should know. He told me that his potential new wife would regret her decision and that any child of his would be gay and he (Jonathan) wouldn't be able to cope with it cos of the religion that he is immersed in. (NB I just found out that my ex and his new wife are pregnant!)

I went back and confronted Jonathan. We couldn't cope with the pregnant yoga women so went to the toilets in the primary school he works in - we kicked the kids out!

I ended up having to leave because I had to give my Mum a lift to her work - she was very happy I'd left him!

Instead of going to her work, we went to celebrate at a seafood restaurant.

It was a cabin built up on stilts and there were sharks swimming about. Then I spotted a new species - a big flat oblong swimming thing and remarked on it. It housed itself under the other stilt structure opposite us and thrashed about like a loon and caused it to collapse. It then started firing star shaped lego type things at us that were heavy enough to destroy the building - kind of like meteorites...

I couldn't save my mum and then I woke up.

WHAT THE FUCK!

Royal Navy Reserves - Major Bucket List!

So, life is short. We know this already.

I've done a lot with my life and have had lots of experiences so far. What does this all mean? I have no idea!

I just know that there has to be more to life than making films, studying at Uni, being a performer and teaching people acting stuff.

So, with this in mind, I've decided to sign up for the Royal Navy Reserves in memory of my Dad. This way, I can give back proper. I might go to war and everything!

My Dad was (is) amazing. He's been dead for 19 years. I've lived on this planet without my Dad for the same length of time I was with him. That's a bit weird. I'm only 38 and my Dad has been dead for half my life. Fuck sake. 

To read more about my amazing Dad see here and here and here and here

I'm not sure that I was put on this planet to do just one thing. I'm only going to be here for about 90-100 years so I want to do as much as I can in that time cos I've no idea where I go next and I figure, the more things I can do here, the more valuable I'll be on the other side. I also want to feel fulfilled on THIS side of the matrix.

I have a bucket list that is about 3 pages long and I think it would be wrong of me not to try and tick them all off. One thing on that list is shooting a Somali pirate - this is more likely to happen if I sign up for the Royal Navy Reserves. There is logic to my madness!

Some of the more sensible things on my bucket list are:

• Swimming with great white sharks - not just in a cage - actual swimming, in amongst them
• Paying for my wee sis to go and work with the Orangutangs in Borneo
• Paying my mum back what I owe her so she can build patio doors and a conservatory (and a stair lift for when she is an old mong)
• Travel to the parts of the world I missed out on when I worked on cruise ships
• Help build a school in Nairobi and visit the wee man I sponsor there
• Complete a 4 year Degree in Forensic Psychobiology - Classes started on Monday 17th Sept 2012!
• Make Raw Talent Productions strong enough to stand side by side with Lions Gate - Well, I am a member of BAFTA, am producing 13 short films and 2 feature films and am Exec Producer on 1 short and 1 feature (the short just won a BAFTA) so watch this space...
• Live on a barge

There are, of course, lots of stupid things on the list like eating 25 packets of Wotsits without licking my lips and winning again at Century Club (a cruise ship thing). There's literally hunners o things I want to do before I croak!

Back to reality, I know some people say that you have to pick one thing and be brilliant at it. I would question - why? You can be brilliant at lots of things if you open your brain!

10,000 hours makes you expert at something. That is 6-7 hours per day for 4 years. So, if you assume you are active on this planet for 50 years, there are lots of things you could be expert in! Why pick just one?

I don't want to pick just one. I want to pick a few things and keep working on them!

Maybe I'm a weirdo - it has been said before!

I just believe that we have a short time on this planet and the answer to most questions should, in the time honoured improv style be, 'yes, okay or yes, let's' regardless of how ridiculous they appear - otherwise how else will you discover new things?

Of course, this sometimes means that you get off a train 6 stops early to party with people in Newcastle that you just met on the train, but they invited you so why not?

Life is short people. Have a laugh and do random things. Do things that your brain tells you you shouldn't do. Do things that you never thought you would.

Otherwise, what is the point of being here?

I know I'm studying Psychology and 'why are we here' is a big question. I have no idea why we are here. I have no idea what the big picture is. I don't believe in Jesus/God. I just believe that we have an amazing chance to do all sorts of random things and why would we not want to exploit that - especially if it can help other people?!

I will be joining the Royal Naval Reserves on Monday 24th September. I will get my fitness levels up to pass their test and I will continue what my amazing Dad started. 

At this moment in time, I think this is the best way to be spending my spare time - I've already done the drinking and spewing part of my life, I've now moved on to this!

It's all very exciting AND I get a uniform AND a parade when I pass!

Love you Dad x