Serial Killing with a Spatula, Insurance Fraud and a Stolen Smart Car

Another weird dream from The Raw's wee brain...

I was taking my mates to the pub in Bridget (my wee Smart car).  I was ringing Anitas doorbell and looked back to see some random bloke climbing into the drivers footwell of the car.  I went over to Bridget and asked what the hell he was doing.  Then I realised it was the Spatula Killer who had been on the news.  He was threatening to kill me.  With a spatula?  I just laughed at him and told him that even I would make a better serial killer than him and that if he didn't get out of Bridget, I'd rip his head off.  I then phoned the police and they caught him.

We drove to the pub (with shed loads in the tiny boot space of Bridget cos Anita was staying at mine that night, for an unknown reason).  I spent ages outside the pub trying to organise all the stuff in the back of the car and working out what to take into the pub with me.  For some reason, there were duvets, pillows, microwaves, laptops and all sorts of shite in the boot.  Why?  I have no idea!

I finally got myself organised and made it into the pub.  I was drinking magic beer that allows you to drive.  We finally got back outside and Bridget was gone.  In her place was a battered old Golf Polo.  My car keys had been switched and now worked with the Polo.  I was panicking cos my laptop and everything was in the car.  I also had no house keys!

At a table outside the pub was a family.  The man of the family was in a wheelchair and he told me to tell the police my car had been stolen but not to mention the replacement Polo.  He said that way, I'd get money for my car and then be able to sell the Polo to buy a brand new car.  I was not happy with this.  All I wanted was Bridget and my laptop back. (this dream is the reason I did a major back up last week!).

The man in the wheelchair then stood up and told me that he was committing insurance fraud and that he wasn't really crippled but he had to make out he was in case anyone was watching him!

I drove Anita home in the Polo, but one of the doors fell off on the motorway and then we were chased by a gang of Hell's Angels.  They stopped us and were about to batter us but then took pity on us so we went to a party with them.

The End!