Okay, so I get home from work and the little black boy I have adopted needs to go to football practice, at the school where my ex-husband teaches (although in the dream it wasn't the actual school)! This child, for some reason, was wearing a beer stained vest and had shoelaces holding his trousers up.
As this kid was getting organised, my ex-husband walked into my house (not my actual one, my dream one), totally naked. He proceeded to sit in front of me cross-legged and finally spill the beans on everything that had happened. He admitted we should never have got married and that he 'liked' someone else before we walked down the aisle. He told me he'd been seeing a therapist the whole time we were together but didn't do what he was told because he didn't want to actually save our marriage?! I told him to tell his parents that he was in fact the total knobhead in the situation and to leave me in peace to take my adopted and stained black boy to school.
On the way to school, I popped into Poundland (can't remember what for) to find my ex-husbands new woman working on the til. I told her I didn't hate her and that she should be happy. She started crying but I didn't.
I then found myself on a beach playing with horses and trying to fend off soldiers who were coming out of boats to attack the beach. I was suddenly a Kung-Fu fighter and everyone was standing at the side cheering for me whilst I was getting pissed off that they were letting me take on all the blokes by myself.
I then ended up in a ghost train in Blackpool laughing because it wasn't scary at all.
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