A Whale Ate My Head

Latest dream installment:

Last night I won a trip to go and watch sharks and killer whales on a small boat with 10 people I've never met before. I was very excited. We got into the middle of the sea and, after one small accident where one of the women fell in the water and got mashed up with the propellars, the sharks came flocking.

I was a bit scared because one of the people on the boat was massive and insisted on sitting next to me which put my end of the boat almost in the water.  I've never seen so many sharks. There were literally millions of them. Then it happened. We fell in.

One of the killer whales was trying to gnaw on my head and I thought it was cute cos my wee cat used to do that. I did realise I needed to get away though because my blood was going in the water and the sharks were circling. I magically discovered I was wearing a full scuba suit and sank to the bottom of the sea, watching the sharks and whales above me. Then a baby shark swam over and told me that the big sharks had a plan and that I should get out of the water and go and visit my pal before it was too late. I boosted to the top of the sea and swam like a loon. 

Suddenly I was dry and scuba suit free and in my mates house.  I walked into the living room and all the people that were on the boat (except the mashed up woman) were sitting behind some gauze and holographic sharks were floating about the room.

I went to the kitchen to make some tea and my pal came in playing with my new house phones and generally being a tit. On opening her cupboards to get cups for tea, I found that they were full of glasses which were full of meat. I made a joke but it didn't seem weird!

I escaped and ended up in Canada visiting my cruise ship pal. I got stuck in the gold encrusted lift and finally made it to her penthouse. She left me to go out and buy Pringles and wine.

Then I woke up.