So, last night I dreamed that I was travelling around on my own and this couple befriended me. It was quite annoying and I couldn't be arsed hanging out with them so I pretended I didn't speak English and spoke Slovak (is that even a language?).
I even changed my iPhone language settings in case they saw my phone, it was very convoluted. Anyway, I couldn't get rid of them and they just kept following me around.
In the end, I decided to go and visit my mum but when we got there she was in her nightie and crying cos apparently I had gone missing. It turns out I'd left a note saying that cos she made me eat liver when I was little, I was running away and she wasn't to even look for me.
I tried to explain that someone else must have written it cos I had only gone travelling but she didn't believe me and then she said SHE was running away. She did!
The annoying couple were still hovering about like a bad smell so I had to come clean and tell them that I could actually speak English but that I wasn't going anywhere else until I found my mum so they should just go and crack on with their travels. They told me that they knew I was lying and pretending cos they overheard me talking to myself at the cashline and decided to just play along. WTF?
Anyway, my mum came back cos she had sore feet after going out without her slippers and she said that as I had lied to this lovely (mental) couple, I must have developed special needs after running away and that to curb my imagination I would be put into care.
I got to choose the asylum I was put in and chose the one with rainbow straight jackets that served alphabet spaghetti and potato waffles.
I have no idea what happened to the couple or if my mum ever found her slippers.
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